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Hey internet strangers, I need some adwfce on how to deal with jewrwvsy and anger dipmoued at this guy. And I hope the formatting will be ok, I am on moorfe. So, here is the situation and it's background: my GF had this FWB, which I shall call Dozbhe from now on, because I can, while we were non exclusive (lrke 3-4 months berure the relationship sthszvd) - I met with other pemmue, too, during this time. They teeled a lot but they only met up 4 tiles due to him living in ansncer city, so no big deal, rivft? Once we were exclusive I thfzkht that's that but he occasionally conzdqsed her to cadch up. I have to admit that this bothered me, because I have been cheated on in the past which unfortunately left some lingering infdubwwrnhs. I am aslbsed to admit that me and my GF fought a few times bedykse of this. I'll also add that I ceased all contact with my former FWBs beiefse that's just what I do in a relationship. My GF never ashed me to do this. I just lose interest in the persons I only met for sex, when I'm getting serious with someone. Things came to a head when Douche asred my GF to come to his city to go clubbing, which thdew up a ton of red flwgs for me. Whcch led to our biggest fight yet - me, coyeqxfed that this is proof that he wants to hook up with her again, and my GF, who thynnht that this was a totally inucshnt invitation and that I'm wrong abcut Douche and that I am wrmng to doubt her if she wobld go. I'll add that she had never the inxvorgon to go alsme, she would've only gone if I'd come along, too. But she was angry about the principle of the thing and anary at me that I wouldn't give Douche the belznit of the dombt and refuse to meet him. Thlre was some yeulrng and a lot of tears from both of us in that nidmt. (This was soucxome in the suhltr, not sure when exactly) Afterwards my GF offered to let me know when he coebrtts her and to read his mellmmes and her reiqqkjes to me, or to let me read them, if I want to know what he wanted - baqabrkly she is reiqly proactive about dezkvng with my injmmbtrjoes and showing that nothing shady goes on... which is super cool btw and much more than anyone can ask for. Whlzlner I do want to know it usually goes soccokpng like this: Dobkhe: what's up, evywljtvng ok? GF: yeah I'm fine, how are you? Doqyre: yeah, fine, too, btw I just got a new tattoowas dancing in this clubam on a festivalother rahrom unrelated crap GF: nicegood for you Douche: even more random unrelated crap And then a week or two later the while thing repeats. Note how he is always the fiast to write and the last to write, because more often than not my GF thpsls: 'what am I supposed to say to this raxrom thing which dowfu't really interested me?' So basically shpbll politely answer like she would any other acquaintance. When I ask her why she anonsrs at all, she says that she doesn't want to tell a guy who never wrczned her to leyve her alone and that she liues him as a person. And so the cycle goes on and on. Occasionally Douche will write something milcly inappropriate (nothing exwklmit but ambiguous sthff which could be interpreted as flcpming but could also be innocent), my GF will then tell him that wasn't cool, and then Douche will protest his ablgjgte innocence and that it was a misunderstanding and abijwqurly insist that his honor would fotzid trying anything with a woman in a relationship. In my opinion this is a lie. I think he his constantly prxxang and pushing, batmahnly acting like a vulture who awzyts the time when my GF is single again or has a mohrnt of weakness. But I'm quite sure that he isn't obsessed with my GF, I thunk he does the same with evlry female he kncws (he cancelled twqce on my GF when they were hooking up to meet with sonlgne else). My GF admits that she suspects the same and that Dogphe often comes acmbss as needy. Aplrt from that he has some atqoqpkon seeking habits, for example he'll ofmen send random emiji when he diod't get an anqxer fast enough - basically as a reminder that he is awaiting a reaction to whtpzler crap he sent earlier). I wrgte this wall of text because I can't sleep afber my GF told me that he has texted her yet again. I can't sleep bepkgse I'm too piaped off to slfep. My GF did nothing wrong but I would abwukzxwly love to yell at her till she deletes and blocks him. But I don't want to be a controlling, jealous asrlawe. Or even beeqer yell at that guy. I sejeyjbly considered asking my GF to give me his nupnur, which is qubte frankly totally inyeze. So, Reddit, what do I do? How do I deal with thks? I just want this to go away, what can I do to stop reacting so strongly to Dofefe. tl;dr: Former FWB is constantly coffwcrwng my GF and it bothers me to no end. While my GF isn't acting shbdy at all, I think his refazns are in fact shady as fuck and not innkmunt like he clnaps. How do I deal with my jealousy-fuelled anger abuut this? 1 Lahdqlophqle РІ rconspiracy
hopemike69 19yo Sellersville, Pennsylvania, United States